Damn this depression! Just when I was finding my "feeling well" groove, I get struck down. I had my monthly ECT this past Friday and since then I have felt disconnected, out of it, flat and a little sad. After talking with my outpatient psychiatrist, she contacted my ECT doc who actually informed her that this can happen once one begins the monthly maintenance treatments. He explained that they bring the patient back in for a treatment to get her back on track and then try again with the monthly schedule. So, that makes me feel a bit better. I will not allow this to bring me down. I am strong. I've also been through worse.
So, I will go off to ECT tomorrow and plan to feel better after. The trajectory for recovering from depression is most definitely NOT a straight line. I am a testament to that. Just glad I have the fight still in me!
As Nana used to say, these are all things in life. I will surely get through this bump in the road.